I remembered why I stopped drinking.
My body does not tolerate alcohol very well.
I also remembered why I loved drinking.
I wish I could say I don’t like doing drugs, but I can’t lie to myself.
I love everything about getting high.
The struggle to find something good.
The drive back to the apartment.
Setting up the lights to fit the mood.
Music. Definitely music.
I also remembered why I enjoyed getting high and doing drugs alone.
Because with them the music is shit.
The lighting is wrong.
The noises are too fucking loud.
But I finally remembered why I stopped drinking and taking drugs.
I stopped because they were never good for me.
They simply help in creating an illusion – a very powerful illusion called life.
I decided to forge my own path that encompasses my mistakes and accepts them, and has the audacity to accept who I am with everything that comes with it.
I will become whatever I aspire to be.
No more hiding behind clouds of smoke.
No more stepping on used needles and empty bottles.
No more running away.
This is why I’m starting the 120days Journey tomorrow.
Categories: The Journal