#00047: White Coat Fever

*Written on May 13 2013. Unedited.

I wanted to become a doctor simply because I wanted to help people.

3 years into Med school and I can finally admit that I’ve been lying to myself.

CT scans? X-rays? Differential diagnosis? Case studies? Memorize everything. Regurgitate it. Delete it from your system.

Stand to the right side of the bed when you approach a patient. Remember, he’s a patient, not a human being. He’s case number 34071; a 56- year old male, who smokes and drinks. He was diagnosed with blahblah and is currently taking blahblah medications. What is your differential diagnosis?

What is the most respected and overrated profession in the world? …

Now the words of my A-levels academic advisor are ringing in my ears: there are other ways to help people. It doesn’t have to be medicine.

But those other ways aren’t as “respected” as medicine.

You’re walking down the street and you meet two people. Person A is a physician. Person B never finished college. Your brain has just pre-judged those 2.

And this is why I wanted to fail, sir. I wanted to lie and say “Hey, I gave it a shot. It is not for me.”

I want to lie by saying the truth.

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